Nov. 24—When it comes to grand parenting, there are at least two major categories.
One I call the "meat and potato" category. This is where the extended families live in the same neighborhood and are in touch multiple times through the week, with helpful activities being a two-way street and happening multiple times a week.
A second category are families where live hours or even states or countries apart and only get together several times a year — if they are lucky. I call this category the "spice of life."
Then there are the grandparents who are actually raising their grandchildren or the families that are, estranged and have no contact with each other. I don't what category to call these situations other than sad situations.
We fall into the meat and potato category. We live practically next door to our grandchildren and are an integral part of their daily lives. Before they started kindergarten, we cared for them one to two days a week as the parents worked, and now we are there to meet the school bus when they get home.
We cook dinner several days a week, too, and they love staying with us long enough to take long bubble baths. Such regular interaction also puts "meat and potatoes" grandparents into the disciplinarian category, not just because it would be irresponsible leave it all to their parents, but because undisciplined children aren't that fun to be around.
Our interactions are day-to-day activities that aren't all that fun. They help with chores, get help with homework, need to clean up after themselves and we really don't leave the farm much other than an occasional trip to the park or the library.
Grandparents who live miles away and don't have the option of daily interaction must make each minute of every visit count. That often happens by packing in every fun, age-appropriate activity that can be found into each visit. Time spent with the "spice of life" grandparents is indeed memorable and mostly gains them the reputation of being the fun ones, even the preferred relatives.
Those who only see their grandchildren occasionally don't have to worry much about discipline, teaching life lessons or even helping them develop good habits. The short-lived moments together are to be savored in every way.
The "spice of life" set often gets to be the special occasion relatives because adult children often have time off during longer holidays or summer vacations. That leaves the "meat and potatoes" grandparents home alone, which has been true in our case almost since the twins were born.
While it is lonely as we celebrate Thanksgiving or Christmas without the joy of children in our midst, Rich and I firmly agree that being the "meat and potatoes" category is, by far, the best fate.
Maybe we don't make the most fun memories or rank at the top of who the kids would rather be around, but nothing can replace the satisfaction of knowing you are part of the expanded circle of influence that can help a child feel loved, treasured and self-confident as they make their way in this world, step-by-step, year-by-year.
"potato" - Google News
November 25, 2021 at 06:22AM
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OPINION: Meat and potato grandparenting - Yahoo News
"potato" - Google News
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